‘Had and still have tough times where I think I I’m not good enough to do anything with myself, to appreciate who I am, to be with someone who’s kind to me, too selfish and insecure to love and move forward. Really bad thoughts rounded my head at times, and yet I was too coward to do it. I’ve learned to be conscious of it and understand why… and even when I feel weak now I’ve learned to keep a little fight in me and see things simplified and not to think in absolutes. One day I’d love to be that of what my heart craves so much. (Anthoine from Lovedon, United KinDom)’
i completely understand the sentiment and am going through similar things! i really like the wordplay you did with Lovedon 🙂
we are all going through a very tough energetic period right now, with all the things going on in the world, it is perfectly natural to feel down. people who have severe up’s and down’s are emphatic, and they feel things differently, that is, more intensively than others, and sometimes those feelings leave us with anger, frustration, and anxiety that is not our own, but is left from what we receive through our life.
it is important to understand your own feelings from those that we mirror from others, meditation and simple breathing exercises can help us to filtrate them, and calm our hectic minds that take us to dark places. when we wish to harm ourselves, it is the pain that wishes to be released, but when we don’t know how to do that in a proper way, it conjures dark thoughts. the way you can learn to release your pain through exercise, in that way you create a natural channel that gets rid of unwanted frustration. all these things seem just too simple, but they are very effective and they do truly help.
the one thing i have decided from all of this is to be unapologetically myself and that is to let people a bit more into my life, to see my “sense of humour” to show my body my ideas my childish side and be proud of it. it took a long time and it was a long journey, hell i’m only doing it now when i’m 28, but it’s never too late to let go and completely surrender to what you are and what you desire.
i send you love, and if you ever wanna talk, or share, I am always here.